I didn't know how much I longed to be a mom until I became one. Nothing in your whole life can ever prepare you for the daily joys and sorrows that this 3 letter title can give you. Mom.
And I never knew. I had no idea.
But I wanted it, as it turned out. Badly.
I have the joy of being home with my girls, and that is a privilege for which I am thankful every single day. We've had 6 years of togetherness, they and I. 6 years to create a daily pattern that has its ebbs and flows, like anything else. Our good moments are golden and our bad ones can be frightful. In the end, it all works out.
Today I found myself squished on the couch between them: each of us with a book in hand, quietly reading away a few minutes of the afternoon. And it caught me off guard, this moment of peaceful bliss. It was a portrait of who we are as Mother & Daughter: Comfortable. We can be together. Just like that. Be. I love it. I love this.
Like every moment, it passed too quickly. The timer went off on the oven sending me into the kitchen, and I came back into the family room to find my spot on the couch taken over by a large pile of Care Bears who were being lectured by two little girls waving their books around with a flourish. "Honestly, Cheer Bear! I don't know what to do with you," exclaims Ashlyn. (Cheer Bear, for her part, looks dejected). "OH! Share Bear. THAT was certainly a very bad choice, don't you think? I think you're going to bed right now," declares Caedance, "Bad choice." (I don't know what Share Bear had done in my absence, but I can say that she did not look apologetic about it. Whatever it was.
And so we go on about our day. We've had 6 years to perfect this. 6 years to go along and get it right, get it wrong. But to be together.