Hopeless romantic or some kind of deranged fool; call me what you will, but I was one of the um-teen billion people watching the Royal nuptials this morning. I didn't get up to watch, mind you. I'm far too lazy for that. Instead I took the more common approach of DVRing the event so I could peruse it at my leisure.
And fast forward through all the boring bits.
Having dropped the girls off at school and making a quick stop at Panera, I was ready to begin; seated in a comfy chair with the required "Royal Wedding Observation Refreshments" of scones and tea at hand. I hit play and off I went on a magical journey that had absolutely nothing to do with me at all.
The funny thing about weddings for me is that I experience them so differently now that I'm parent. Before having my own brood, weddings held all the romance and ooey-gooey-huggy-kissy stuff that dreams are made of. It was all about The Dress! The Music! The Ceremony! The Reception!
I would get caught up in all the little details of someone else's big day, and that would be enough to pull me back into the memories of my own wedding.
But once I became Mom, that all changed.
Now I view these blissful events as previews for the time when I'll be watching our girls stand at an alter and "pledge her troth" to (what we pray) will be two amazing men. Where I used to focus on the bride, my eye now wanders to her parents: how are they holding up? Is Mom crying?; finding myself wondering what I'll do when I'm in that place.
I know they won't be marrying a prince. We're praying for a priceless man, nonetheless.
And I wonder how I'll be able to let go.
I've never been sure how my parents did it. And I was so young! Days away from my 20th birthday; completely young and totally confident in the promise I was making that day. (Still confident in it, nearly 13 years later). But....man....how hard to let go.
But I'll have to do it. Twice.
The girls talk about marrying twins, which is something that I secretly would love.
They talk about a double wedding. (How fun would that be?)
They talk about wearing my dress...or fighting over it I suppose, in the case of the double wedding.
They talk about wanting to marry their daddy. (Can't say I blame them on that since he's a pretty stellar guy, if I do say so myself.)
But they also talk about having a trampoline there.
And having only peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and lots of Jello at the reception.
And still living with Dan and I after the knot has been tied.
So I know we still have awhile to go before I have to start planning anything.
Or letting go.
So for now, I'll push that little thought under the rug.
Out of sight, out of mind.
For now, they are all mine.